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Gruntilda/quotes
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Gruntilda is infamous in the gaming world for her hilarious and very bizarre rhyming quotes. This page is a collection of Gruntilda's rhyming quotes throughout the Banjo-Kazooie series.
In Certain Areas
Gruntilda's Lair
At Random
- Many tricks are up my sleeve, to save yourself you'd better leave!
- Grunty's plan is rather cunning, when I'm thin guys will come running!
- Long of tooth and strong of arm, Grunty's got the lasting charm!
- My filthy bed gives me a rash, I never wash, I save my cash!
- I don't like stairs much in my lair, they always make me gasp for air!
- Can't you get here any faster? Come and fight me, I'm the master!
- If you think I'm rather soft, I'll be waiting in the loft!
- Why do I talk all the time, it's really hard to make these rhyme!
- I'm still here, I watch you play, but I can't think of much to say!
- It really does sound quite absurd, adventure of a bear and bird!
- How bright they are, your stupid shorts, a target for my dumb cohorts!
- That ugly bear, you feathered freak, is nothing but a stupid geek!
- Join me now and dump the bear, that little backpack then I'll wear!
- You side with Banjo but change tack, imagine you on Grunty's back!
- Your feathered buddy, that you've brung, useless like a pile of dung!
- I can see it's quite hard work, to lump around that squawking jerk!
- My next world is the hardest yet, and you'll fail on that I'll bet!
- Tooty's fate is looking grim, it's because her brother's dim!
- I've got this skirt so when I'm thinner, it really makes me look a winner!
- When Tooty is a big ole lump, I've got just the frock to hide her rump!
- Your butt will tell you and you'll know, when my boot swings to and fro!
- When the back of Grunty's hand, whups your butt you'll hardly stand!
- Hey Banjo, you're looking glum, it must be hard, being so dumb!
- Grunty's stomach and leg thins, goodbye to all those double chins!
- Once I'm nice and thin once more, burgers, fries, and chips galore!
- Tooty says she's fine with me, if you go home I'll set her free!
- Grunty admits she's a hog, I really need a big hot dog!
- Monsters chase you, they're a hounding, then you'll get a Grunty pounding!
- My belly's big, it's rather neat, it's years since I have seen my feet!
- I've learned this spell, it's really neat, I'll keep it later for your treat!
Specific Events
- There he is, the fun begins, my tricks and traps will see who wins!
- That was such an easy fit, the others may just test your wit!
- You've found some notes but you need more, to break my spell and pass this door!
- That door was easy you got past, unfortunately your first and last!
- When you open a world door, baddies escape and roam once more!
- If one more page I see you turn, than (sic) Grunty shall Cheato burn!
- That traitor book has pushed its luck, so in the burning fire I'll chuck!
- What's wrong Banjo, is it tough? Let me know when you've had enough!
- It's not over stupid bear, see my picture over there!
- To fill it up is no mean feat, lots of Jiggies make it complete!
- I'm sad to say down there you'll stop, 'cuz I'm safe here at the top!
- Don't be sure you silly pot, soon I'll have you nice and hot!
- See these filthy clothes I've got, when I've won you'll wash the lot!
- All the Jiggies you did snatch, but I'll be back for my rematch!
- Stop This Cheating Grunty Says, Or Your Gamepak I'll Erase!
Treasure Trove Cove
- That golden treasure was for me, now harder still the game will be!
- That lousy cheat for extra eggs, won't help bear and chicken legs!
- All my feathers, it makes me sick, fly to me, your butt I'll kick!
- Gold feathers you may have twenty, but bruises you'll still get plenty!
Bubblegloop Swamp
- First you see it, now you don't, the fast one wins, the slow one won't!
- I'll be young and Tooty old, before you get Gruntilda's gold!
Gobi's Valley
- Grunty's race you cannot beat, until you find some faster feet!
Mad Monster Mansion
- Those lovely thorns, how they've grown, music to my ears as you moan!
- I can't believe you went in there, wash your hands now, filthy bear!
- These two guests are rather dumb, let's make sure they're unwelcome!
- Yes I'm mad, my boot I'll put, up your useless spooky butt!
- Big oak door is very tough, stupid bear's not fast enough!
Rusty Bucket Bay
- My oily water, in you plunge, you'll lose air while in that gunge.
- Under the scum you'll breathe your last, 'cuz air is used twice as fast!
- Stupid bear, you'll have to learn, that red hot ovens tend to burn!
Click Clock Wood
- My bramble field makes you yelp, and loss of life it sure does help!
- Yes that's right, swim under there, icy water takes double air!
Top of the Tower
- I CAN'T BELIEVE THAT FURRY PAIR GOT RIGHT UP HERE. IT'S SO UNFAIR! BUT NOW THE STUPID BEAR MUST FIGHT. THIS BATTLE TESTS YOUR SKILL AND MIGHT!
- SO YOU'RE BACK, YOU MUST BE THICK. AGAIN YOU'LL LOSE, I'LL MAKE IT QUICK!
- I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU'RE BACK AGAIN, STUPID BEAR AND DIM BIRD BRAIN!
- BACK ONCE MORE, YOU NEVER LEARN. THAT SUITS ME FINE, YOUR BUTTS I'LL BURN!
During Cutscenes
Introduction to Banjo-Kazooie
- Dingpot, Dingpot by the bench, who is the nicest looking wench?
- Yes you're right, I'm rather proud, my looks stand me out from the crowd!
- What d'you mean, this cannot be, there's no one prettier than me!
- No no no you must be mad, nicer beauty can't be had!
- If Tooty thinks she's fairer than me, I'll steal her looks and ugly she'll be.
- Come to me, my little pretty, you'll soon be ugly, what a pity!
- Don't scratch and bite little bear, you'll soon need bigger underwear!
- This fine contraption, so I'm told, will make me young and Tooty old!
- Rescue you he will not dare, there's many danger's in my lair!
- Hurry Klungo push that switch, I'm tired of being an ugly witch!
Game Over From Banjo-Kazooie
- Banjo's game ends in my tower, turn it up I need full power!
- Look at Grunty she's a beauty, I'm much prettier than Tooty!