Difference between revisions of "Brentilda"
→Gruntilda Facts
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==Gruntilda Facts== | ==Gruntilda Facts== | ||
*Grunty brushes her rotten teeth with salted slug flavored tooth paste! | *Grunty brushes her rotten teeth with salted slug flavored tooth paste! | ||
*She also washes her hair with engine oil! | *Grunty brushes her rotten teeth with mouldy cheese flavored tooth paste! | ||
*She also washes her hair with engine oil. Yuk! | |||
*She also washes her hair with rancid milk. Yuk! | |||
*And she gets her clothes from the trash can! | *And she gets her clothes from the trash can! | ||
*And she gets her clothes from the Witches Warehouse! | |||
*Grunty wears a flea circus under that repulsive dress of hers! | *Grunty wears a flea circus under that repulsive dress of hers! | ||
*She's also got this nasty pet dog whose name is Ripper! | *She's also got this nasty pet dog whose name is Ripper! | ||
*My sister sings in her own band, | *My sister sings in her own band, Grunty and the Cauldron Crew. They're Awful! | ||
*My sister sings in her own band, Grunty and the Broomstick Boys. They're Awful! | |||
*My lazy sister often sleeps in a pig sty, the dirty hag! | *My lazy sister often sleeps in a pig sty, the dirty hag! | ||
*The only thing she's ever won was the | *The only thing she's ever won was the Biggest Butt Competition at Witch School! | ||
*The only thing she's ever won was the Dirtiest Undies Competition at Witch School! | |||
*She often boasts of appearing on the cover of Fat Hag Monthly, posing in her long-johns! | *She often boasts of appearing on the cover of Fat Hag Monthly, posing in her long-johns! | ||
*She often boasts of appearing on the cover of Fat Hag Monthly, sitting on her broomstick! | |||
*My fat old sister's favorite sport is broomstick racing! | *My fat old sister's favorite sport is broomstick racing! | ||
*My fat old sister's favorite sport is belly barging! | |||
*Although she's dim, she attended Fat Hag High! | *Although she's dim, she attended Fat Hag High! | ||
*Although she's dim, she attended St. Dungball's School! | |||
*You won't believe that Gruntilda's party trick is blowing balloons up with her butt! | *You won't believe that Gruntilda's party trick is blowing balloons up with her butt! | ||
*Grunty's best friend at Witch School was the awful Fatty Hatty! | |||
*When relaxing, she usually reads Fat Hag Monthly Magazine! | |||
*When relaxing, she usually reads Big Butts and Guts Magazine! | |||
*While sipping a glass of her favorite camel spit milkshake! | |||
*While sipping a glass of her favorite cold worm juice! | |||
*The disgusting Gruntilda has spider pancakes for breakfast! | *The disgusting Gruntilda has spider pancakes for breakfast! | ||
*The disgusting Gruntilda has rat bagles for breakfast! | |||
*Then she usually has slug stew for dinner. Yuk! | *Then she usually has slug stew for dinner. Yuk! | ||
*Then she usually has maggot pie for dinner. Yuk! | |||
*Wartbags then finishes with eyeball ice cream for dessert. How horrid! | *Wartbags then finishes with eyeball ice cream for dessert. How horrid! | ||
*Wartbags then finishes with cockroaches and cream for dessert. How horrid! | |||
*Did you know Wartbags keeps a dragon's foot in her pocket for luck? | *Did you know Wartbags keeps a dragon's foot in her pocket for luck? | ||
*I've also seen my sister cuddling a huge sweaty baboon in bed at night! | *I've also seen my sister cuddling a huge sweaty baboon in bed at night! | ||
*I've also seen my sister cuddling her dirty undies in bed at night! | |||
*She's really proud of proud of her broomstick. It's a top of the range Super Gutlifter Pro! | *She's really proud of proud of her broomstick. It's a top of the range Super Gutlifter Pro! | ||
* | *She's really proud of proud of her broomstick. It's a top of the range Lardmaster 2000! | ||
* | *Gruesome Gruntilda's favorite pastime is flying radio controlled bats! | ||
* | *This poor guy called Undead Ed was her first and only boyfriend! | ||
*When she was younger, Grunty used to have a baby dragon as a pet. | |||
== Notes == | == Notes == | ||